I want to start this over again....

I want to close my eyes and travel back in time. The exact day?

The 28th day of the 2nd month of this year.
I want to open my eyes and find myself in that chair, looking across at you. Those eyes looking back at me.

I want to close my eyes and travel back in time. The exact day?

The middle of March this year.
I want to open my eyes and see you walking towards me. Smiling as always. Where we used to spend endless hours together. Whole days spent just doing nothing. When you looked at me with smiling eyes, and maybe I imagined it then, but I thought those eyes lit up everytime I smiled back.

I want to close my eyes and travel back in time. The exact day?

A day in June this year.
I want to open my eyes and see you waiting there for me. The day I did the worse thing imaginable. I was horrid to you. The things I said. The way I acted. Was it my fault? Did I do this? Or did I just see the light in yours flicker and disappear forever? I'm not sure.

I want to close my eyes and I never want to open them again.
I saw your eyes. I didn't see them light up. I didn't see the smile. It felt strange. I wanted to reach out and give that special hug that I keep just for you. But its gone now.

I want to close my eyes.
I want them to stay closed. Until I hear your voice, feel your arms again.

How did this happen to me?
I can't explain and I can't erase the things I've done.